Friday, January 16, 2015

What will I ever do with a genie?

Ever since I was a kid, I had these random whimsical wishes that may or may not have included having a genie or a time machine. There was always that one thing that would make my life perfect. In that moment anyway.

I have always been a last minute person. I would study literally one day before the exams or do my homework one day before it was due. My genie wish in those times would include my homework being magically done or all the subject material magically getting into head and staying there until the end of the exam. Ha. So convenient. I was very sneaky that way. Not that I ever got my wish. But I passed. 

When my younger sister had just surpassed me in height and was turning out to be much taller than me, my genie wish was to grow a few inches taller. That phase lasted for several months.

Anytime I saw a dance or a music competition, my genie wish was to be able to sing and dance. I was always so envious of people who could do either, or worse yet, both. 

And there were times when the going got tough and I would wish for a time machine that could take me into the future to when the trouble was gone, or go back in time so I could fix whatever it is that caused the trouble to begin with. I wanted to be a fixer. That’s right.

Did I mention that I was a realist too? So without any mutant ninja super powers, a time machine or a genie was my only way out.

Oh, well. The things that we do.

I rarely wish for a genie or a time machine now. But hypothetically speaking, unlike the earlier times when I thought it was a real thing, what if I did have a genie or a time machine? What would I really ask for? I had to think long and hard for this one. Absolutely nothing came to my mind for the first 10 minutes. There is nothing in my life that I need a genie for. Whaaat? How did that happen? Is it because I already have everything I need? I don’t think so. Or is it because I feel way above the whole genie and the time machine thing now that I am a grown up, non naive, world adult. Oh God, I hope not. Or is it because I have way too many things to ask for and I could not prioritize? Maybe. I am not too sure. 

Slowly and gradually, some ideas did trickle into my fickle brain. I realized that I couldn’t come up with anything because most of my wishes are small little things. “Everything” is an extremely subjective and strange term. I have everything I need. Mostly anyway. But there is nothing like everything. You can always have more things. And you can always do with less. So what is everything anyway?

But apart from that philosophical rant, here is a list of things I want.

A caramel macchiato at my fingertips. Anytime I want it. I don't (know how to) make it at home so I rely on outside sources if and when I want it. I never need it need it. Yes, I meant to type it twice. To emphasize that I don’t really need it, but just kind of need it.

Oh, and a magical trip to Patagonia with the husband. That would be nice now, wouldn’t it?

Also, a day to sleep in. Till 9. It has happened a few times over the last 3 years, but it is still a rather rare occurrence. So it would still be one of the top contenders in my genie wish list. 

A spa treatment. A 90 minute spa is all I need at the end of a tiring day. And the world will be a perfect, happy, disney place once more.

A night when both kids sleep 12 hours straight. Without crying or making noises or walking up to our room in the middle of the night saying “mumma, daddy.” In the sweetest, most affectionate tone possible. Don’t get me wrong. I love it when my kinds say mumma and daddy with a lot of love and affection. But a 3 am shout out when it is pitch dark everywhere feels more like a scene from Paranormal Activity. 

A day when Sammy will eat vegetables and Rehan will not throw his food to indicate he is done. That dream might stay a dream forever. Maybe Rehan will stop throwing his food when he is a little older. And he will join Sammy in the no-vegetables camp. I have this eerie feeling that might be my reality. 

And then, I ran out of any more ideas of what I want from a genie.

I realized my genie wish list is nothing extraordinary. It definitely does not include being able to sing or dance anymore. I don’t give a rats you-know-what about how tall or short I am either. Especially because 34 years on this planet is just enough time to convince me that by the time you are 34, your happiness will not be derived from your height (weight for that matter) and it won’t matter whether you are 4’10” or 5’10”. Unless of course, you are into basketball. In which case you might get a little bit more anxious about this height thing. I also don’t bother about the time machine during my difficult times. Again, don’t get me wrong. I hate tough times just as much as my next door neighbor. I detest those from the bottom of my heart. But I have realized that I don’t need a time machine for me to get through tough times anymore. I need me and I need Siddhu. And that should do it. Unless of course, Siddharth is the one who is giving me a tough time. In which case, I still need him so I am not yelling at the walls. It is much more comforting if my words are bouncing off of him as opposed to the walls. Unless of course, Siddharth finds my words funny and starts to laugh in the middle of our very serious conversation. In which case, it is not very comforting. 

Given everything, I wonder why would I need a genie at all? The only reason why I will ever need one is in a dire situation. When the whole science and the mankind thing fails, you know. But other than that, I don’t need a bottle phenomena to take care of my wants and wishes. If I do ask for that one burning wish that I need in my life, what will happen after I get it? Will I want more? Or will I achieve nirvaana? Or will I not need anything else ever again? It is a vicious circle. There is no end to it. So what’s the point? And while I was overthinking this ridiculous hypothetical proposition, it occurred to me that this entire genie thing is a big trap. It is meant to transport you to a unicorn world in which closing your eyes is enough make your wildest dreams come true. But, that sounds somewhat similar to this world. Minus the closing eyes part. Close enough. 

The only reason why this exercise is worth it is because it made me think about what is really important for me. And as it turns out, it is coffee. I can’t believe after thinking for 10 minutes the first thing that came to my mind was coffee! Go figure. I was also surprised that my wishes had nothing to do with the well being of my family or my kids. That sounds a tad bit selfish, I think. But hey, it is what it is. I still care for my family. As far as life changing wishes are concerned though, I have trust issues. I think if I really really, I mean really badly, want something, then I can’t really leave it to a genie. So if I want something really badly for my family’s future, or my family wants something really badly for our future, we will work for it. A genie is not going to cut it, my friend. 

I don’t have the power to prepare the world for me and my family. But I hope I have the strength to get us ready for the world. That is just enough. In any case, I don't mind going to coffee shops to get my caramel macchiato, or find a deal for a spa treatment, or maybe, just maybe, one day leave kids with our family and go on a vacation with my best friend. 

My Positivity

Heading from this cold frosty winter to a warm family waiting for us back home. A short trip and then we are back. I cannot wait. My favorite part of course, my nieces.

Saying bye bye to winter for a short while. Will miss you. Kind of. Sort of.

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